I’ve always struggled with small dreams. As kids we are told to “dream big”, “sky’s the limit”, and a thousand other positive things that make us to want to grow up and become astronauts and cure cancer. So what happens if my dreams stay small even when I dream big? Do I need to have a big reach to feel like I’ve accomplished God’s plan for my life?
I’ve watched friend after friend receive blessings and opportunities a hundred times over and here I am…still waiting.
In these moments I can’t help but wonder, “God when is it going to be me”, “Will there be enough left over after you’ve blessed them for the thousandth time?!”. It’s hard, brutal even. It’s hard to wait patiently while you watch blessing pour out like manna rained down on someone else. What sucks even more is that there isn’t a formula. God isn’t a Fairy Godmother (or father if we want to be correct). I can’t just say the right words, in the correct order, at the right time of day and than “bippity, boppity, boo”, everything will align for me. If that were the case, my dreams would look quite different, but I am not so sure I would want them anyway.
Somewhere along the line we got this crazy idea in our head that if we aren’t impacting thousands then what we are doing doesn’t matter to the world or to the Kingdom. Perhaps that mindset is due to our fascination with social media, viral new stories, and a world desperately seeking to be needed.
Though what if changing the world doesn’t look how we imagined? I’ve sat back dreaming and praying that God would use me in a big way, and I am not giving up on that, but I believe God turns big things out of small obediences. Lately, I’ve had to ask myself, “Will I be okay if I have big dreams and only a small impact?” The answer: I don’t know if I will be okay, but I do know I will be used for the glory of God. And that has to be enough. If it isn’t, then what’s the point of surrendering my life to God’s calling?
This semester, Asbury Seminary has challenged us to #AttemptSomethingBig. It is a great and wonderful thing to dream big and believe in our God for big things because I believe when we are aligned with His will He will accomplish them and even more than we could ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20) but “what if?” What if the something big we attempt is just small, slow acts of obedience every day and allowing our God to be brought glory through it? May we trust our God in the big and the small.